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When
You Wish Upon a Star
Today is
the first day of the rest of my life...and yours!
As a cancer patient, I am more aware of the measure of time than
ever before. It's been nearly three years since I was diagnosed,
and six years since the symptoms began to disrupt my life. I
have nearly doubled the eighteen months of the original solemn
prediction of my prognosis, having survived six surgeries,
including four very challenging ones, during the past couple of
years.
During these years I have been without a "certain someone" or a
"love", yet I have felt more overall love than ever before in my
life.
I have just spent a Christmas of joy in Disneyland with my
beloved nieces, Christina and Zoe. Withstanding the crowds
(80,000 enthusiastic Disney fans!), the exhaustion was
worthwhile to witness the spectacular parade of Santa and the
Disney characters as seen through the sparkling eyes of the
younger generation.
As a three year old pre-schooler, Zoe was too amazed for words,
while dimpled five year old Christina waved and called out to
each character as the floats proceeded down Disney Boulevard.
"Hello Snow White! It's me, Christina!"
"Hello Cinderella! I love you!"
Thrilled at seeing all their favorites, my young nieces
recognized and called out to more than thirty Disney characters
until Santa himself floated by, the recipient of even more waves
and little kisses drifting towards him in the balmy Southern
California breeze.
Throughout the Disneyland park, displayed and printed everywhere
on banners, tee shirts and signs, the Disney theme is
"Believe!"
And the nieces truly do!
They believe, they love, they trust!
As the parade continued and the children's delight increased, I
silently thanked the Dear Lord, and my surgeons, for keeping me
on this planet another holiday season.
Limited in the rides I could participate in, we selected It's a
Small World, Peter Pan, Pirates of the Caribbean, the Jungle
Cruise and more. On every ride my nieces tugged for me to sit
between them.
We held sticky hands and sang our way through each ride. Our
favorite songs were "Jingle Bells", "It's a Small World After
All", and the politically incorrect, "Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of
Rum" (okay, it's not exactly appropriate for little girls, but
we were pirates, after all, and, as the wide eyed three year old
kept reassuring me, "the pirates aren't real; they are only
dolls and are make believe!"
So there!
We laughed, giggled and misbehaved with a joy that I was never
allowed to experience during my strict childhood. Now, as the
calendar moves forward, I am amazed to move backward in time,
creating a new childhood for myself as I experience it through
the joy of my nieces.
They freely share with me their crumbled cookies, their chubby
cheeks and kisses, their runny noses, and daycare contagions.
"I love you forebber and ebber!" the three year old exclaims,
while the five year old quotes, "even when we're far apart, I
keep your love here in my heart" from the story book I wrote for
her last year.
Last week I experienced a Christmas I wasn't supposed to live
long enough to enjoy, and and today is the New Year's Day I was
diagnosed not to see. I write this story during a pastel hued
sunrise that I was predicted not to witness. Yet, with the grace
of God, the skills of my surgeons, and the joy of spending time
with my precious little nieces, I am still here!
Believe! |
